Ain't NO Way I'm Taking a Bath

This doesn't make much sense to me...

Each month, Mom puts this nasty junk on my back. It stinks and it makes me all icky and greasy. She says I have to have it to keep the fleas away. You know what it is, though? It's a people repellent! She puts that junk on me and then tells people not to pet me when we go on walks. How rude!

Then, just to add insult to injury, a few days after she puts that junk on me, she makes me take a bath to get the stuff off! It's just absurd.

This is cruel and unusual punishment. So you know what? I'm breaking the cycle this time. I don't care if I've got the nasty stuff on me -- Mom's not going to give me a bath!

Shhhh! Don't tell her I'm hiding in the bedroom...